Demotivational Hump Day... Psychiatry

 

YOU People!

"Why don't YOU PEOPLE have a blood pressure checker? Doesn't ANYONE have a blood pressure checker in these places ANYMORE?!" said the man, early 70s, with an angry, angry, ANGRY look on his face.

The man, facing me, is literally six feet away from the blood pressure "checker" on aisle eight. Literally. 

"It's right behind you," I said, perhaps more gleefully than I usually do because of his attitude.

The man turns around, spits out something inaudible, and sits down to check his blood pressure.

In my mind, I'm thinking, "Why don't YOU PEOPLE bother to look? Doesn't ANYONE bother to look ANYMORE?!"

The Garage Sale

Crazy RxMan decided to have a garage sale.

Crazy RxMan doesn't like garage sales.

Something about garage sales and yard sales or moving sales or estate sales or whatever you want to call "Come Look at our Junk and Buy Some" sales brings out the weirdos and cheapos of the universe.

Granted, if something is used then you can't expect a full retail price on it. You expect to take pennies on the dollar for it. That's fine.

However, if the item is in decent shape or has some sort of intrinsic value, then it's a different story. And every time I've had a garage sale in the past there's always something that mistakenly made it's way to the sale table (like Woody in Toy Story 2)... something that actually has value. I know it, and the guy trying to dicker on it knows it too. And these people can't be reasoned with or bargained with. They think they're going to give you a few bucks for something really valuable and that's the way it goes. 

A guy found a necklace we had given grandma many years ago... a handmade sterling silver necklace. After grandma passed it made it's way back to our possession. I know it's value because I know the jewelry business better than most people. This necklace has at least two ounces of sterling silver in it, so at a pawn shop they'd offer you $30-35 for it just for the spot silver value at today's silver prices. 

But this guy was clever thinking he was going to get it for $10. He wouldn't stop pestering me. "Come on, man, ten bucks cash right here," he said, waving the $10 bill in front of me. When I explained the situation with the price of silver he didn't seem to get it or pretended to be stupid. Finally I had to take the necklace into the house so he would leave.

Then there was a guy looking for old Disney movies on VHS, and we have a bunch. In fact, I have a big box full of VHS tapes of all genres, including Disney movies. I told him, take the whole box for $20. Nope. He dug through the entire box, counting the tapes, until he found a copy of Fantasia on VHS in the original clam shell.

"Well I did some quick math," he said. At $20 for the whole box that's about 20 cents a tape. He hands me 20 cents. I was stunned. I threw the coins into the corner of the garage as he was leaving.

But my favorite story of the day revolves around a guy that was looking for shelving units and plastic stackable bins. He saw on one side of the garage a plastic shelving unit. 

"Ten bucks," I said.

"I was thinking a little less than that," he said.

"Ok, a little less is $9," I said. 

"How about $5?"

"Ok, make it go away."

Oh, he made it go away... AFTER he asked my son to get him a bucket and a sponge. He proceeded to spend THE NEXT HOUR carefully cleaning the shelving unit in the middle of the garage.

I had to get a picture of this, so I did:

Please, someone euthanize me. Please.

Laugh on a June Sunday Morning

Unsatisfactory Pharmacists!

Miss Loosey is back to ask about our drug tests. She wants to test her daughter for Marijuana use. She studies the box intently as I mouth the words "be right with you" to the line of people forming behind her.

"It doesn't say how far back in time this tests for. How long does Marijuana stay in the body? Do you know?" she asks.

I didn't know the exact answer to the question. I told her that it probably depends on usage, how long she's been using it, metabolism... I know a lot about medications, side effects, interactions... but I guess I'm just a worthless pharmacist for not knowing the exact answer to this question. I'm sure also that information is in the kit itself. But maybe Mickey knows.

"Hey Mickey, how far back in time does this test for THC usage?" I yell out to him. We're in our overlap hour.

"I don't know," he yells back. He's helping someone at the drop off window because the munching tech is, well, munching on something in the back... you know, low blood sugar and all.

"Mickey doesn't know either," I say. "I'm sure that information is in the box."

Miss Loosey isn't satisfied.

"Well I don't even know why I come here! You two don't know anything."

She trots off, in a huff. Obviously my inability to give her an exact answer was dissatisfactory. I guess I'll go ahead and change the sign back to a zero again:

Later I found this online: 

This is me...

...Preparing for Corporate's "Hospital Clean" directive.

Weird Sense of Humor Part 2