Happy Easter!

Another Idea of Mine STOLEN

Adding to a long list of items that I invented years ago, including The Internet (sorry Al Gore), jet engines, and that scanner image thing which takes you directly to a website, I also invented this featured cutting board with trays beneath it so you can store your recent chopped items. Yeah, I thought of this idea many years ago. I'm just too lazy to get around to patenting anything so I lose out on all the royalties. Of course, if the person who's getting all the money now feels guilty, you can feel free to let me in on the deal. 

Link: Slicer, dicer, and organizer


Your dog is going to hate this cutting board. In a normal kitchen, when one is prepping food for a meal, there's almost always a bit of carrot, a chunk of cheese, or a bit of bacon that falls to the floor and makes its way into the belly of an eager canine. With the One Stop Chop Cutting Board, these treats from heaven will be a thing of the past.

The One Stop Chop Cutting Board is a raised, bamboo cutting board with three food prep containers. Slice and dice your ingredient, then use your knife to slide it directly into one of the drawers. Repeat for your other ingredients. Then pull out the drawers and dump your chopped ingredients directly into your pot or skillet. Bam! Food prep that is sliced, diced, and organized and with every morsel going directly where it should.

Well that was worth it

So this dude has NETFLIX tattooed on his body. Netflix rewarded him with a year's worth of FREE Netflix ($120 value?). That was worth it, right?

Link: WHAT AN IDIOT

So, you can't sleep...

I fill and dispense Zolpidem (the generic for Ambien) by the truckload. We keep a 1,000 count bottle on our "fast mover" shelf. It is our top ten list of most-filled drugs. The generic is fairly inexpensive now and it is prescribed heavily. And while Zolpidem is the most popular, we do see a high number of other medications prescribed as sleep-inducing agents.

Unfortunately, Zolpidem is a controlled substance and has addictive properties. And based on the number of people that scream and shout when they're out of refills, I have no doubt that it is addictive. I have one female patient taking 20mg of Zolpidem (prescribed by HER doctor), and I suspect she's taking 10mg of HER HUSBAND's Zolpidem prescription and HER DOG's Tramadol, every single night. I've never seen someone go so panicky when one of the family is out of their medication.

Here's some recent articles which you may find interesting. Some of them obviously have the "duh, right" factor, but you'd be surprised how many people don't know the basics.

LINK: Develop healthy sleep habits

It’s important to develop healthy sleep habits and stick to them each night.

The National Sleep Foundation recommends these healthy sleep habits to help you wake up rested each morning:

* Establish a regular bedtime and wake-time schedule and follow it every day, even on weekends.

* Create a consistent and relaxing bedtime routine, and make sure your bedroom is comfortable, dark and quiet.

* Invest in a comfortable mattress and pillows.

* Don’t eat within two to three hours of bedtime, and avoid caffeine, alcohol and tobacco before going to sleep.

* Exercise regularly, but try to schedule your workout well before bedtime.

LINK: Working out before bedtime may mean better sleep

If you are inactive, adding a 10 minute walk every day could improve your likelihood of a good night's sleep. Making this small change and gradually working your way up to more intense activities like running or swimming could help you sleep better.

You have a wake-up alarm. How about a go-to-sleep alarm? LINK: The secret to getting enough sleep

Your alarm is set for 6 a.m., but every morning you hear it blaring and hit snooze. Nine minutes later, you hit snooze again, and again, until your back-up alarm goes off and you get out of bed a bit after 6:40, groggy and pretty sure that planned workout isn't going to happen before you need to leave the house by 7:15. Is there any way to break this cycle?

The key is to realize that if you really can't pull yourself out of bed at the time you intend to get up, you're probably not getting enough sleep. So you sleep in -- but not in a way that's helpful (snooze button sleep is pretty much useless). If you want to get up at a certain time, then getting adequate sleep means you need to stretch your sleep back earlier in the night. That means going to bed on time. And that means setting a bedtime alarm.

Finally, check out the infographic Sleep or Die for other important stuff you may not have known about sleep.

Pharmacy Techs on TOP TEN Most UNDERPAID Jobs

That's right, fellow pharmacists... our technicians are seriously underpaid. The Pharmacy Technician job has made it's way to a recent list of the "Ten Most Underpaid Jobs."


Lead pharmacy technician ($34,900). They help fill your prescriptions under the direction of the pharmacist at a retail chain or non-retail outlet. Yet the interaction with patients is minimal and pharmacies, like other parts of the healthcare industry, are under constant pressure to cut costs.

I've been through my share of technicians over the years and I can tell you that while a bad tech can really make your life miserable as a pharmacist, but a good tech is worth their weight in gold. Certainly a higher wage would attract more of the good technicians, as would NOT REDUCING TECH HOURS, you corporate muckity-mucks.

Freaky Pig for your Dashboard

You've probably seen this ad somewhere along the way in your Internet surfing. I'm certain I've seen it in in English somewhere, but all I could find today was this one. I love bacon and ham, but apparently bacon and ham is so dang good that even a pig will slice himself up for a tasty meal. And this ad shows once again that many vintage ads are quite disturbing.

Perhaps more disturbing is the fact that someone saw this and said "Hey, let's make a dashboard toy to look like that."

And a crazy, insane product was born. You thought the Cat Unicorn Hat was insane. You thought the Bacon Tie was just too much... oh no, now we have the perfect addition to your car.

What do you have on your dashboard? Nothing but a bald patch? Well, you might want to add a dash of style to it, with the $8.95 Slicey The Pig Dashboard Wiggler. Slicey the Pig must be a cannibal with a twisted mind, as he could very well have realized recently as to how delicious he is around the belly, and obviously wants to share himself with you, putting even the most battle hardened Walking Dead character get sick to the stomach. Slicey The Pig Dashboard Wiggler is a vinyl porker who wields a large carving knife to his own mid-section as he grins maniacally while you drive around.

And who wouldn't want that?

RxWiki -- FOR Patients, FROM Pharmacists

If you're a patient looking for comprehensive drug information in a format written with the patient in mind, check out the new RxWiki website. 

Thanks to Jason Poquette for his recent blog post about the RxWiki website. As Jason points out:

RxWiki is a vast and comprehensive medications encyclopedia aimed at providing accurate information, written and edited by pharmacists only, for patients & consumers.  The intuitive layout and readable nature of the content make it very accessible for individuals of all levels of medical literacy.  Complimenting the written information is a large library of videos which provide a great source of visual & audible instruction on both drugs and diseases.  Want to find out more information about a prescription or OTC medication?  RxWiki needs to be one of the very first sites you go to.

Check it out!

Funny is a Sunday

Phew! I was SOOOO worried!

I'm so glad this turned out to be a fake skull. I was really worried, but the advertisement makes it clear that it is just a phoney skull. Phew! 

We definitely need a crystal ball on this one...

Oh, I don't know. Maybe I'm just old fashioned or run things too much by the book, but I really think we need more information on this one.

Fun Website: WeirdoMatic.com

I've come across a website which entertains me. It's www.weirdomatic.com. It's where WEIRD THINGS COME TO LIFE. Many years ago I worked in the vending department at my college. I was known among the local kids as "THE SODA MAN" in the married student housing area. When I cam to refill the machines, they'd come running to watch me fill the machines. Sometimes if the crowd wasn't too large I'd hand out a free soda or two and thus earned the title. Later they'd all come running and yell, "I like try one free soda!" 

Because of my college days, vending machines intrigue me. I'd like try to have my own vending machine company. I'd probably make more money being a pharmacist for a large corporation. So that's why when I saw this listing of unusual vending machines I wanted to share it. For example, WeirdoMatic.com shows some unusual vending machines such as a Chinese live crab dispenser. Or a Lego vending machine. Check out this link for unusual vending machines.

Other fun stuff on this website:

Weird Christmas Lightbulbs

Microscopic Pictures

Old Creepy Ads

Finally, a King-Sized Whoopee Cushion

You can never go wrong with a classic Whoopee Cushion, especially if it is KING-SIZED! This whopper of a whoopee is 12" in diameter for your large-bottomed mark. "It's a real monstrosity of sloppy sounds and laughs. When the victim sits, walks, pushes, or falls onto the surface they'll release a bellows of bootie toots!"

One thing the designers of the large cushion didn't realize... most of your large-bottomed people already toot plenty on their own. And the more I think about it... plenty of people with small buns do plenty of booty boops, but what the heck, let's add to the fun!

Three is NOT Enough!

A lady presents with an Rx for clomid, a medication commonly prescribed to induce ovulation in less fertile females.  This is a standard first line treatment for women who have trouble becoming pregnant for a variety of reasons.  Mind you, women who want to have a baby are for the most part nurturing and loving... the true maternal instinct.  They feel complete as a woman by giving birth and raising children, and those without children who want them feel this need to nurture right down to their bones.  It makes tears well up in your eyes for those who haven't been blessed with children and deserve them...

Back to the lady with the Rx.  She's here at the pharmacy counter with not one, not two, but three little children, one in diapers.  They're all riding in a shopping cart/race car that the grocery uses to keep little people busy while mom tries to shop.  These kids are a handful and the race car isn't helping much.  Little brother keeps running off in his bare feet.  Older sister keeps yelling "Mom, there he goes again!" and runs after him.  Older brother is making a ZOOM ZOOM ZOOM sound as he pretends to drive.

Mother, impatiently waiting for her fertility drug, KEEPS YELLING at ALL THREE OF THEM to SHUT the F--- UP!  Then she grabs the little one by the arm, points her finger and him, and says something I can't quite hear but I can only imagine because he starts to wail.  Just as he's reaching the peak of his scream, a bag of Cheetos bounces off his face, thrown by older brother.  At this point the tech and myself go into overdrive to get that clomid ready so she can run home and have more kids!  After all, THREE is NOT ENOUGH!

Mind Reading Skills

I don't have any mind reading skills. They didn't teach that at pharmacy school. Nor do I have a crystal ball. Every day I get someone here at the pharmacy and I wish I had mind reading skills or a crystal ball. And every time, the patient or whoever looks at ME like I have bananas growing out of my ears for not being able to read their mind or figure out what they want.

Example # 1:

A lady walks up to the counter and says she needs "Crackenspoil" cough drops. I've never heard of them and I'm pretty sure that she's 100% sure that's what they're called despite my trying to ask her if maybe it might be called something else. So I look on our database. No, no such luck. I'd look on the Internet but we're not allowed to have Internet access anymore because too many pharmacists were using it to find doctor names, addresses, OTC product info, etc., and we sure don't want them to be able to do anything like that. So I send them to the competitor across the street. I'm sure they must carry Crackenspoil cough drops.

Example # 2:

Lady: "I need to get my prescription filled."  She says the word "need" like this is a bonafide 9-1-1 emergency and the four horseman of the apocalypse will appear if she doesn't get it.

Me, looking on the computer: "Ok, what is the medication?"

Lady: "I don't know."

Me: "Ok, you had your blood pressure med filled about 20 days ago and your depression med filled about 22 days ago. Is it one of those?"

Lady: "I don't know. It's my little white pill. Don't YOU know what it is?"

Me, standing in front of $200,000 worth of inventory comprised mostly of little white pills, "Well, both of these medications I've mentioned are little and white."

Lady, clearly getting angry: "I don't know why I come to this pharmacy! No one knows anything here!"

Example # 3:

A man comes in to fill a prescription. It's available only in brand name and his insurance doesn't want to pay for it. It says "NDC not covered." So I say to the patient, "Your insurance doesn't want to pay for this medication. It's either not on your formulary or requires a prior authorization." So then he asks, "Why?"

I don't know why.  My crystal ball is broken.

Happy Green Day!

Sunday, Time to LOL

Beauty Shop Scare Prank

Boogity boogity!

Cool prank, but was it a good idea to do this with scissors all over the place?

Beware... R rated...

Beauty Shop Scare Prank

Don't Want to Share a Bench?

So, you're out in public. You need to sit and wait at a local restaurant. There's only so many seats available to wait, but by golly you sure don't want a crazy pharmacist to sit next to you. You want to sit in peace and read your AARP magazine without being bothered. So all you have to do is sit far enough away from one edge, cross your legs like you're Dick Cavett, have your shirt unbuttoned, wear cheap jewelry, and proudly display your "mandals" to scare off any potential bench-sitters. Also, place your "man bag" far enough over so that no one can actually sit at the other end of the bench. Mission accomplished! The Crazy RxMan stayed far away from that bench!

Dark Sun Glasses, the FIRST Giveaway

Pharmacists pick up on the subtle but then there's the obvious. If you're going to pass a fake Rx, your FIRST step is DON'T WEAR DARK SUN GLASSES. You'd think they'd figure it out by now. But no, they haven't. Week after week, WEEKEND after WEEKEND, here they come marching in with the fake prescriptions... Oxycodone 30mg #120, nearly perfect handwriting, filled out with date of birth and even address. Yeah, all my busy doctors do that, sure. 

But the first dead giveaway is the dark sunglasses. It immediately says you're hiding something. And apparently there are still a few pharmacists out there who never question any of it, and maybe that's why you do it. 

But don't expect to come around my pharmacy wearing dark sunglasses. I'm going to immediately check your Rx top to bottom, inside and out, to figure out if it's a fake.

Lunch Lady Action Figure!

I've already ordered one. It's on the way now. THE LUNCH LADY!

Fans of Adam Sandler and Chris Farley will remember his tribute to the Lunch Lady in this video.

What really sold me was one Amazon review:

Stick with me as I go through this review because there are some things you might have missed in the product description and details.

First, some clues that you should buy this:

1. You went to grade school and loved or hated the lunches.

2. Just looking at her makes you remember the canned spinach or asparagus they served, along with the texture and smell.

3. She looks like a lunch lady from your school.

4. She appeals to you on some subconscious level and you need to explore that further. Go with it.

5. You KNOW she has to be a collector's item. Trust that feeling.

Now, features you might have missed:

1. You can customize the food by putting different stickers in the three serving containers. Wow! I prefer the spinach colored one and then a macaroni and cheeey one......and I'll let you guess about the third one. Why take away all suspense?

2. She is an action figure. Parts of her move.

3. The package info is funny. You'll have to trust me on that one.

4. She'd make a great gift for any lunch lady YOU know and love - or any child you want to traumatize. I don't really encourage people to traumatize children, just a little humor there. Parents will understand and, hopefully, anyone who has been around children and occasionally feel the urge to throttle them...but only in their imaginations, not in reality.

"You're a real jerk, man!"

That's what he said to me. And he yelled it.
 

I was at another pharmacy, working overtime. This guy comes up and asks for his prescription.  I go to the will-call area. Nothing is there. I ask him for his name. He rolls his eyes. He spells it for me. I type it in the computer. Nothing comes up. I ask him again. He repeats it back to me, louder this time. Obviously I'm the idiot so let's speak up. I ask for his birth date. I put it in the computer. There is only one patient in the computer with that birth date, and it is not him, unless he is actually a she and she is cross-dressing. 

I tell him that I can't find him in the database. He's getting visibly angry. I said, "This isn't my normal pharmacy, but I can't find you in the system. Is it possible that you go to another pharmacy to get your medications? There is a pharmacy right next door..." (There are three other pharmacies within 1/4 mile of this location). He cuts me off... "Listen up, Mister..." he says... "I've been getting prescriptions here at THIS pharmacy for TWELVE YEARS." Now I take people at their word and figure I must be doing something wrong, so I go back to the computer and I try his name, his phone number, date of birth again...  nothing is coming up. I cringe as I tell him again that he just isn't in the computer.

He yells, "You're a real jerk, man!" and storms off. I'm shocked and want to... you know, slam a hammer into his skull, but you can't just do stuff like that anymore, so I compose myself. A little later I'm still trying to figure out what happened. Just to satisfy my curiosity I call the competitor next door. Sure enough, he's in their database and has a prescription ready to pick up. I ask more questions, and the pharmacist there tells me that yes, this man has been doing business with them for a long, long time. 

So after awhile when it slows down, I pick up the phone and call the guy using the phone number he gave me earlier. He answers the phone and I tell him who I am, that he mistakenly came to our pharmacy, and that his medication is at the pharmacy next door. Do you think he apologized? No, he didn't. And somehow I'll bet he still thinks I'm the jerk. But I'm not a jerk. I'm just crazy for working retail.

Elmers Glue and Duct Tape

"Do you have any Elmer's Glue?" she asked.

A lady, mid twenties, is at my IN window. I tell her we have Elmer's Glue on aisle 10 on the left.

"No, do YOU have any Elmer's Glue?"

I look in our drawer that is labeled OFFICE SUPPLIES. Everything is labeled now. It's part of our organization's new organization plan. Not one manager can tell me exactly how this increases script count, but we're dang organized. I'm also surprised the drawers themselves aren't labeled DRAWERS, just in case you didn't know what a drawer is. I have a sneaky feeling that the company plans to replace us with some real idiots in the future... ones that will have to have everything labeled because they can't figure out anything on their own. Or more likely, the company already thinks we're a bunch of idiots right now and they think we need to have everything labeled. After all, these are the same people that invented Quake-N-Zap.

Anyway, sure enough, we have some Elmer's Glue in there. Maybe some pharmacist before me used it to glue broken tablets back together, I don't know. Nothing surprises me anymore. I hand her the bottle and she dabs a little on her finger. She reaches up and without a mirror places the dab on her split left earlobe. She's done this before, I'm thinking. At some point in her life she must have had an earring ripped from her earlobe and it was split to the end. She holds the split earlobe together for three or four minutes while I just look at her, bewildered.

Then she reaches into her pocket, takes out an earring, and puts it in her ear.

"How do I look?" she asks. 

"Great." I reply. I'm older and wise to this female trap question.

"Thanks." She leaves with a smile on her face.

As she's walking away, I see that she's wearing jeans and a good portion of her jeans are taped together with duct tape, the shiny silver kind.

Just another normal day at the pharmacy.

Sunday, Funny Sunday (apology to U2)