More One-Liners from the Pharmacy

Actual things said to me at the pharmacy...

My friend's dentist said this is exactly what I need. [an OTC item that has nothing to do with dental work]

You WILL fill that with generic. [Pointing at me]

I have an upset stomach. I need Imodium or Milk of Magnesia now.

I'm calling to have you fill my prescription that's on automatic refill...

I'm allergic to prednisone and all steroids.

I refuse to take a Medrol pack because I don't want big muscles.

Don't run it on my insurance. I want to save them some money.

Did you fill my Silverstatin?

Did you fill my Atorka-statin?

Please fill my Lipitor. It's for my cholesterol. [Thanks, we didn't know that]

You don't really think I need to go to the ER, do you? [Patient's arm is covered in blood-soaked rags]

This medication expired in 2004. Do you think it's ok?

How come you're never here anymore? [I work 40 hours a week, sometimes more...]

Where's the Viagra? I can't find it out here anywhere.

[Phone rings several times... caller gets put on hold... finally I get to the phone] Wow, are you guys busy?

Why doesn't my insurance cover it?

[Phone rings... I answer] Is this a secure line?

Where's the Liver Pills?

[Waits in line 15 minutes to drop off a new script] Why will it take 45 minutes to fill it?

What's Prozac for? [Patient asks same question EVERY time he comes in]

YOU gave me Endocet. MY prescription was for Oxycodone!

But the OTHER pharmacist said it would be here...


See more from the past HERE.