Monday, March 18, 2013

Mind Reading Skills

I don't have any mind reading skills. They didn't teach that at pharmacy school. Nor do I have a crystal ball. Every day I get someone here at the pharmacy and I wish I had mind reading skills or a crystal ball. And every time, the patient or whoever looks at ME like I have bananas growing out of my ears for not being able to read their mind or figure out what they want.

Example # 1:

A lady walks up to the counter and says she needs "Crackenspoil" cough drops. I've never heard of them and I'm pretty sure that she's 100% sure that's what they're called despite my trying to ask her if maybe it might be called something else. So I look on our database. No, no such luck. I'd look on the Internet but we're not allowed to have Internet access anymore because too many pharmacists were using it to find doctor names, addresses, OTC product info, etc., and we sure don't want them to be able to do anything like that. So I send them to the competitor across the street. I'm sure they must carry Crackenspoil cough drops.

Example # 2:

Lady: "I need to get my prescription filled."  She says the word "need" like this is a bonafide 9-1-1 emergency and the four horseman of the apocalypse will appear if she doesn't get it.

Me, looking on the computer: "Ok, what is the medication?"

Lady: "I don't know."

Me: "Ok, you had your blood pressure med filled about 20 days ago and your depression med filled about 22 days ago. Is it one of those?"

Lady: "I don't know. It's my little white pill. Don't YOU know what it is?"

Me, standing in front of $200,000 worth of inventory comprised mostly of little white pills, "Well, both of these medications I've mentioned are little and white."

Lady, clearly getting angry: "I don't know why I come to this pharmacy! No one knows anything here!"

Example # 3:

A man comes in to fill a prescription. It's available only in brand name and his insurance doesn't want to pay for it. It says "NDC not covered." So I say to the patient, "Your insurance doesn't want to pay for this medication. It's either not on your formulary or requires a prior authorization." So then he asks, "Why?"

I don't know why.  My crystal ball is broken.



7 comments:

legaldrugdealer said...

happens to me everyday, about 5 times a day...people are ridiculous

Hildy said...

Do you have wi-fi either in store or a hotspot nearby? If yes, bring a tablet to work, then you can get on the web without using the store's internet connection. How do they expect you to function without being able to look things up on the web?

Vingtcinq said...

Cepacol? Creomulsion? Ricola? Boiron Roxalia? Cepastat? Sucrets? Zicam? Chloraseptic? Coricidin? Glockenspiel? If you ever find out what she really wanted, please let us know because this is driving me crazy.

Footie said...

Dear CrazyRx man....
Please take heart that your mindreading skills are just fine. You are clearly obtaining all the information available in said minds.
Priding myself in my diagnostic acumen, I percieve that your problem isn't a telepathic deficiency, but as you suspect - your fractured crystal ball. I prescribe an immediate replacement and that you include a refresher on clairvoyance in your CE program.
KR, Footie

Crazy RxMan said...

We actually do have wifi in the store but for some reason NO ONE knows the username and password. NO ONE.

As for the Crackenspoil, I never did find out exactly what the lady was after. I still have no idea what she was after.

Alex said...

Only $200,000 in inventory? I feel like I have that much in my fridge...

Alex said...

Only $200,000 in inventory? I feel like I have that much in my fridge...