...in all the WRONG places. She's at least 15 years older than me, but she's gots the hots for yours truly. And who do we have to blame for this? Her son, Levaquin Boy.
Awhile back Levaquin Lady was in the hospital for pneumonia. When she returned home, Levaquin Boy came by with another script for Levaquin. Now she's up to 750mg TWICE DAILY. I've never seen such a high dose with any other patient. I've left several messages for the prescriber to call and talk this over with me, but he's got a God Complex and minions and pill-counters like us Doctors of Pharmacy are not important enough to call back.
Levaquin Boy was feeling sorry for his mom at home. She was discharged early because of new hospital rules regarding reimbursement which are a direct result of major changes in healthcare, but I wouldn't want to point any fingers at the culprit because there's just soooo many readers of this blog out there that are quite happy with the way things are going healthcare-wise. Someone might say "Socialist Libtards," but I won't.
Anyway, Levaquin Boy decided he wanted to make his mom feel better by getting her a little stuffed animal. I don't even remember what it was now... a chicken? A flamingo? Hell, I don't know. But what I do remember is that Levaquin Boy (he's 27 years old, by the way, living with mom "because of the FAILED ECONOMIC POLICIES of the BUSH ADMINISTRATION" -- whatever that means.) Levaquin Boy didn't want to his mom to know he bought the plush toy for her, so he asked if he could tell his mom that I bought it for her.
"Sure," I said, not realizing what a mistake that would be someday. I imagine that's how the "Shake Weight" was funded by some capital finance company. "Sure, we'll pay to have that go into production." I can also imagine that's how a lot of crazy tattoos appear on people. "Sure, a skull with bleeding eyes looks like a good idea to me!"
So now when Levaquin Lady comes in, she rolls up (in one of those electric shopping carts) with her hair nicely combed, make-up on, and smelling of some cheap perfume. The perfume isn't enough to cover up the smell of her smoking a pack or more a day, so the blending of the smoke and perfume has a tendency to make me gag a little. And of course, now Levaquin Lady is really, really friendly toward me. I don't know whether to think it is cute or not but I just try to be nice and not fuel the fire started by Levaquin Boy.
More stories about Levaquin Lady:
Levaquin Lady, part deux
She was lookin' for love in the wrong place
Lookin' for love with a familiar pharmacy face
Searchin' my eyes, lookin' for traces
Of what she's dreamin' of
Hoping to find a friend and a lover
I'll bless the day she discovers,
SOMEONE ELSE - lookin' for her love...