Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Favorite One-Liners

I need BRAND. Generic didn't do ANYTHING for me.

I'm allergic to anything man-made.

I'm looking for the Tylenol with the Motrin in it.

Where's the bathroom?

Where's the dairy section?

I want the REAL stuff.

Can you fill this right now? My dog/husband/wife is waiting in the car.

I read it on the Internet.

I haven't seen you in a long time. Were you on vacation?

Dr. Oz says to get it.

It's homeopathic!

My stomach can't tolerate anything but brand.

I'm allergic to all generics.

I'm going to pay CASH.

It's cheaper across the street.

Where's Mickey?! He didn't quit, did he?

Wow, that's the FIRST time I've ever seen you sitting down.

Are you eating lunch? [Clearly I'm eating lunch] I have a question.

[On a medication NOT on Auto Refill] Why did you fill this medication? I don't need it yet.

I need the NON-DROWSY psuedofed.

I need the NON-DROWSY Benedryl.

I need a NON-DROWSY sleep aid. [Yes, someone actually said that to me]

[Monday Morning] Oh? You can't fill them right now? Are you busy?

Why do I need a prior authorization? My doctor prescribed it!


Pharmaciststeve said...

You might add.. " I am allergic to all generics"
I only take something that is "natural" because there are no drugs in them..
my reply to the latter.. then you use Marijuana and Opium products (Cocaine, Morphine) since they are all "natural products"

Anonymous said...

I work at a compound pharmacy and someone asked if we "Organically certified". They were dead serious.

Can someone tell me where I can get organically certified?

Anonymous said...

I once had a lady (obviously ethnic from her thick accent, by the way) throw a fit that her alendronate 70mg was not "made in the U.S.A." and she had "only been taking medications made in this fine country" and that clearly we ignored the note in her profile that stated her refusal of all products not manufactured in the US. I proceeded to pull all of the stock bottles of medications she had received in the last month, Brand name meds included, and I went through them one by one with her to show her that NOT A SINGLE ONE was manufactured in the US. All she could do was tell me that I was an "idiot pharmacist" and she would be back the next day to speak to my manager. She didn't bother to ask where the old pharmacy manager was - I was his replacement.

Anonymous said...

Can you not get Claritin (loratadine) for allergies in the US? Would that count as non-drowsy Benedryl?

Crazy RxMan said...

Claritin(Loratadine) is available in the United States and is available as a non-drowsy antihistamine.

Benedryl is a different product-- so asking for "non-drowsy Benedryl" is funny to pharmacists because Benedryl (Diphenhydramine) causes drowsiness.

Anthony said...

I think one of my favorites is "Only the purple one works for me. The green colored one does nothing."

I love when you get to tell them the purple one isn't made anymore.

Anonymous said...

"Do u guys have 'the purple'" I respond Purple what? "purple sizzurp?"
What color Norco's do u have because the yellow are worth more on the street?
You're never gonna believe this, buy my whole bottle of 120 Tylenol #4 fell into the toilet!
I need the

Unknown said...

A foreigner telling me they don't want the brand made in India....

Anonymous said...

Oh man! We dispense so much prometh w codeine at my pharmacy. I love the dumb comments these "patients" make. They call and just ask "do u have any purple". Purple what? WTH I can write a book on sizzurp. Sad!

Anonymous said...

Do we work at the same pharmacy, anonymous? Lol but seriously

Anonymous said...

Beneday is cetirizine, aka Zyrtec in parts of Europe.

Anonymous said...

I had that. Except the Med was made in Puerto Rico. I'm like that's part of the US. She didn't want a med that was from a 3rd world country

SCgirl74 said...

Oh yes, I think she comes to my pharmacy now. Or maybe it's her sister, she refuses to take generic medications because she insists that they are made of plastic. She is dead serious.

SCgirl74 said...

Also had a patient a long time ago tell me she was allergic to milligrams, it was so hard to look her in the eye when she told me that! No point explaining anything to someone who is convinced this is her true allergy.